For a while now I’ve bounced the idea around in my head that the future is as fixed as the past. When I say I think the future is fixed and unchangeable, I’m not referring to fateism, which is the theological belief that god is the arbiter of the future. My beliefs align more with the deterministic school of thought, the idea that the future is determined by preceding events in a never-ending butterfly effect. Following this school of thought, every decision we make is already determined by preceding events, which does make sense to me as the human brain at its core functions as a computer. The brain consciously and unconsciously computes information that it’s given and makes a decision. There is no randomness in how we process information, therefore all of our decisions are based purely on preceding events. These preceding events can vary from someone punching you in the gut to the tiniest movements of chemicals in the brain, and these events themselves are dictated by preceding events.
One of the reasons why this idea weighs so heavily on my mind is because it can’t be proven or disproven. The theory states that there’s only one decision you’ll take in any given circumstance due to cause and effect, but that’s impossible to prove or disprove, because in the end you will take a single decision, which could be the only possible decision you could’ve made, or it could’ve been one of millions. This theory also goes against chaos theory, which states that all natural systems are inherently unpredictable due to the amount of variables present in natural systems, but then again fractals, a commonly used example of chaos theory, are famous for following patterns. The main reason this theory weighs heavily on my mind is the idea that it invalidates the idea of self-determinism. After stewing over this for a long time, I came to the conclusion that determinism doesn’t invalidate self-determinism because we still make decisions ourselves, these decisions are just the only decisions we would ever have made due to cause and effect. By determinism, I was always destined to forget my keys in my dorm room when I went to tennis practice that one day, but it was also my fault for forgetting them like a dope as well.
The theory of determinism no longer brings me a feeling of dread, as I’ve reconciled my beliefs in regard to the theory. Determinism says that there’s only one outcome based on all preceding events, but it doesn’t mean free will doesn’t exist. Determinism doesn’t mean you have no control over your actions because they’re predetermined, it means that the action you take in a situation is the only action you would’ve taken. After reconciling my beliefs, I’ve come to believe that the future is dictated by determinism, and it’s just as unchangeable as the past.
For a while now I’ve bounced the idea around in my head that the future is as fixed as the past. When I say I think the future is fixed and unchangeable, I’m not referring to fateism, which is the theological belief that god is the arbiter of the future. My beliefs align more with the deterministic school of thought, the idea that the future is determined by preceding events in a never-ending butterfly effect. Following this school of thought, every decision we make is already determined by preceding events, which does make sense to me as the human brain at its core functions as a computer. The brain consciously and unconsciously computes information that it’s given and makes a decision. There is no randomness in how we process information, therefore all of our decisions are based purely on preceding events. These preceding events can vary from someone punching you in the gut to the tiniest movements of chemicals in the brain, and these events themselves are dictated by preceding events.
One of the reasons why this idea weighs so heavily on my mind is because it can’t be proven or disproven. The theory states that there’s only one decision you’ll take in any given circumstance due to cause and effect, but that’s impossible to prove or disprove, because in the end you will take a single decision, which could be the only possible decision you could’ve made, or it could’ve been one of millions. This theory also goes against chaos theory, which states that all natural systems are inherently unpredictable due to the amount of variables present in natural systems, but then again fractals, a commonly used example of chaos theory, are famous for following patterns. The main reason this theory weighs heavily on my mind is the idea that it invalidates the idea of self-determinism. After stewing over this for a long time, I came to the conclusion that determinism doesn’t invalidate self-determinism because we still make decisions ourselves, these decisions are just the only decisions we would ever have made due to cause and effect. By determinism, I was always destined to forget my keys in my dorm room when I went to tennis practice that one day, but it was also my fault for forgetting them like a dope as well.
The theory of determinism no longer brings me a feeling of dread, as I’ve reconciled my beliefs in regard to the theory. Determinism says that there’s only one outcome based on all preceding events, but it doesn’t mean free will doesn’t exist. Determinism doesn’t mean you have no control over your actions because they’re predetermined, it means that the action you take in a situation is the only action you would’ve taken. After reconciling my beliefs, I’ve come to believe that the future is dictated by determinism, and it’s just as unchangeable as the past.
The thought of what I might do after college with my degree or even in college never crossed my mind until after a few weeks I arrived at college. I knew I wanted to study Exercise Science, but I never set myself any goals with this. While we can all hope and dream, not everyone can attain those hopes and dreams. And I’m not talking about hoping for good grades, I mean the success and opportunities that will come from those grades. I want to put myself out there and meet new people and build strong connections with people that can help me find my success.
Here at UNE, we have access to all of these great resources and opportunities that can lead us to success not only academically but also personally. I need to start taking advantage of these opportunities, especially now that I have more time to myself. I’ve started to explore different internship opportunities that the AES program could help set up with me. This is very important to me because this is how I could get a job in my degree of work. Building connections with not only my current AES professor, but also the professors I will have over the next 3-4 years. They are the ones that have those connections and if I continue to make a good impression upon myself they will have great things to say during my internship application process.
Overall, I have realized a lot about my own wants and desires as a college student over this past semester. Talking to professors, friends, and even my parents opened my eyes to a lot of different paths I could take to reach my goals and the “success” that I want to achieve. However, talking to upperclassmen in the AES program left a significant impact on me and what I want to gain from the experiences this university offers. Looking forward, I will continue to make great use of my resources surrounding me because this will only help my path of attaining both my degree and a job in the near future.
I believe that being kind is punk rock, and I think of Superman as the best possible example, not as a symbol of hope, but as a lonely figure hovering above a world he cannot fix. Beneath the suit and emblem is someone who trusts everyone and thinks everyone is beautiful. We will never fully know what others are carrying, the exhaustion or stress weighing on them. But we can choose to pause and to show up even when it is hard or inconvenient. These acts do not erase the world’s burdens, yet they are quiet rebellions, fragile, fleeting, and full of meaning. They remind us, and those we reach toward, that even in the midst of chaos, human connection still exists.
I am incredibly lucky to have my very own Superman to look up to: my dad. He is the walking definition of kindness, strong in a way that isn’t loud or flashy. His strength is quiet, patient, and unyielding. He shows me every day that courage is not about invincibility or grand gestures, it is about staying soft-handed in a world that would rather you harden, choosing to give when it costs you the most, and refusing to turn away from the suffering of others.
This year, my dad was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis, a chronic autoimmune disease that attacks the protective layer around the nerves in the brain and spinal cord. Thinking back on all our years in church, he was always the first to hold the door and greet new members, offer help in Sunday school, or step in when someone needed support. He has always been the model of who I hope to be, someone who gives without expectation and leads with quiet kindness. Even now, as he faces this diagnosis, he remains just as open and generous as before. When the world gives him every reason to turn hard, he chooses compassion. He still welcomes anyone in need, offering what he can, even on days when he has so little left for himself.
I believe in spending quality time with the people you love. One of my love languages is quality time, and I believe that going out of your way to spend quality time with loved ones creates deep, meaningful connections that will last a lifetime.
My grandfather, Poppop, owns a 1968 Chevrolet Camero. A beautifully shiny, black classic car with two thick white strips down the middle. A car that not only sparked my grandfather’s interest but also sparked my father’s interest and my own. When my grandfather was working, he would come home every day and spend time perfecting his already perfect Camero. When my dad was young, he spent every second he could out in the garage helping my grandfather get the car ready for the next big car show. With the Camero being the winner of almost every car show, it became a passion of both my dad and Poppop to attend as many car shows together as possible.
When my dad graduated high school, he went right into trade and started working as an auto technician. Poppop was the reason my dad loved cars, so he decided to spend the next 37 years (as of 2025) underneath and in the hoods of cars trying to fix them.
On take your child to work day I would always beg to go with my dad. I thought that tearing things apart just to put them back together was fascinating. I would sit on my dad’s work bench handing him tools and writing everything he said down in my blue sparkly notebook. He sparked my passion in cars, and now the three of us bond over that same 1968 Chevrolet Camero that my grandfather still takes to every car show. That car has been the talk of my town for almost 50 years, and it will continue to see the street instead of sitting in a garage thanks to the quality time that my grandfather, my dad, and I all spend together. Seeing the physical trophies on the shelf in Poppop’s garage reminds me of the hours that we spend together talking about the same car. Some things never get old.
Truly getting to know someone comes with spending quality time with them. Not only do you get to know your loved ones better, but you create common interests and similarities. Building deep connections builds your character, which is why part of my character shares a common interest with the characters of my dad and my grandfather. Take the time out of your day to do something you love with the people you love, it will change your life forever.
Most people go through life waiting for the next thing to happen and always looking ahead to the future. I get to go home this weekend, I have these plans for this day, and the list goes on. I am just as guilty of this as anyone else, I look ahead, wait for the next thing, ect. While this is not always a bad thing we don’t always realize that while we are looking ahead we are missing things in the moment and then we look back and think how crazy time flies or how we wish we would have enjoyed this moment more when we were in them. I have always thought like this and yet I still continue not to think too much at the moment. I started working as a cna when I was 17 at an assisted living and I believe that since working there I have gotten an overall new perspective on life and just how fast time goes.
Working at assisted living and helping others while also hearing so many different stories from my residents has changed my overall perspective on life. It was very humbling starting to work here at a younger age and just seeing the different perspectives people have on aging. I will go into residents’ rooms and help them with things that at this point in my life I just could not imagine not being able to do myself and realizing that one day I will probably be there too. Residents just love talking and sharing stories from their lives and I always love when they show me pictures from when they were younger as well and it really puts into perspective how fast time really does go by.
I think the main takeaway from this is just to try to live life more in the moment and try to not live life mainly looking to the future.
Before coming to UNE I had few solid friends and didn’t really fit into a group. High school felt like a secluding place and that only certain people deserve to have large groups of friends. When coming to UNE I discovered that this was a fresh slate and everyone was starting over. Having the comfort of knowing this allowed me to be myself and not try to fit into a mold or expectation. A motto I live my life by is everything happens for a reason and things will always work out eventually and I think coming to UNE and finding my friends and settling into a place where I feel comfortable was the biggest proof of this motto for me. Throughout my entire life I have always felt like I didn’t know where I belonged or who I belonged with. Coming into college I knew I wanted to try to find myself and people who aligned with my values and supported them.
Something I knew was important to me when attending college was surrounding myself with people who I felt comfortable with and could feel the same with me. Thankfully that happened within my first days here and I built a strong community of people who I trusted and could be myself around. I began to get closer with my group and individuals which led me to some of my best friends. After things wouldn’t go our way, we would remind ourselves that everything happens for a reason and we need to accept the fact that not everything can go as planned all the time. Being able to share my belief of that helped strengthen our friendship knowing she shared the same one and reminding each other of it. When others ask why we believe this or what it is we explain it as accepting what we are giving and making the best of it because if you can’t make the best of what your given life will be miserable and unenjoyable so if you roll with the punches and find the joy in the little things life can be so fun.
When I think about the happiest times in my life, I think about what it took for me to get there. I ponder the choices I made, the people I met, and the risks I took. I’ve noticed a pattern within this: I’ve found that I experience my best moments when I’m outside of my comfort zone. When I step outside of that box of comfortability, I find new friends, experiences, confidence, and I make my most joyous memories.
Growing up, I was told by my mother, “Good thing you’re so tough.” She would use this to empower me during hard moments. I found it invalidating at the time, but as I matured, I found a sense of strength in it. I realized what she meant by it, the depth she was conveying in her words. When I encountered difficult times, I thought of this saying, and I persevered. With this new found strength, I felt comfortable stepping outside of my comfort zone. I felt safe within the unknown of life, fearless of the inevitable ebb and flow. I pursued opportunities, even if I had to work hard to get them. I found a sense of reward and fulfillment once I tackled difficult experiences. And best of all, I felt confident in myself even in the most unstable times.
The beauty of life is found outside of your comfort zone. It might sound daunting to climb a mountain, but if you find joy in the climb, if you let go of your fear and negativity, you will be free of the confines of your comfort zone. And, when you reach the summit, the sense of satisfaction you feel within yourself will be paramount to any other feeling. There’s a lot to learn from pushing your boundaries. You will find your happiest, most confident self. You will make many memories to look back on, and smile.
This piece is going to be about personal growth and how at the right time and with the right people personal growth can be a huge magical thing for someone. This can be something that is very important to one person and not as much to another. You know in high school, that time when a teacher makes everyone write something down that they want to improve on or work on. There is always that one person who says they want to grow as a person and try to improve themselves. A lot of times there isn’t just that one person that wants that. More often than not there is at least one other person that wants to say that but they think that it is not a good enough reason. Personal growth or growing in general is a good thing that happens. The current adults in the world had to have gone through personal growth at some point, maybe they are still going through it or just starting to go through it. When I was in middle school my best friend decided that we weren’t friends anymore. That moment made me think back and look at everything and for me that is when some of my personal growth started. I realized that not everyone I was friends with actually liked me and it was bringing me down. I dropped those people and it was like some sort of weight was lifted, I found people that liked me for me. They understood my humor and we shared jokes and memories and created new ones. I found these people freshman year of high school and we have been friends ever since. They make me feel like me and see. They helped me figure out who I am in a way and feel good about who I am. Finding these people can be like a light at the end of a tunnel. If you don’t surround yourself with people who will help you grow and become who you want to be, they shouldn’t be worth your time. You will know at the time when you find the people that will help you become you. Sometimes to get personal growth you might need to step out of your comfort zone and try some new things and meet new people, have a change of scenery. Trying to find things to unlock your new personal growth. No one ever stops growing they just might not know that it is happening, which is ok because that means that they are comfortable with personal growth and things changing.
Coming to college has made me realize that you will find your people. Back at home, I live in a very small town where everyone knows everyone. This makes it very hard to choose who your friends are. Oftentimes, I found myself stuck with the same group of people. Throughout my entire childhood, during elementary, middle and some of highschool, I would have friends but they were never very meaningful and most of them ended with an argument. I didn’t feel like I was being treated like I should be so I dropped those people. After years of doing this I began to think that this is how friendships are. That was until I met my best friend. Meeting her and becoming so close opened my eyes to what true friendships are. I felt so lucky to have her. Then I moved away to college and met 7 more friends just like her. This is why I believe that true friendship is one of the best things you can have in life.
I fully believe that I am nothing without my friends. I have a lot of trouble putting how I feel into words. Throughout my life, I have not had the best luck with friendship. I may have always had friends but they never lasted because I felt like I cared way more than they ever did. When I care about someone, I put a lot of effort into my relationship with that person, and when I didn’t receive that back I was often hurt. When I finally found friends that returned the same amount of effort that I put in, I was so happy. This is why I believe that true friendships are one of the best things you can have in life. I am so close with my friends that they feel like a second family. Since having friends like these, I have never been happier. I value these people as much as I value myself and I know that they feel the same way.
This I Believe Essay Outline
I believe in protecting your own peace and wellbeing above everyone else. There is only one way to ensure your peace; do what makes you happy, not what makes others happy. Setting boundaries and making your intentions clear is not selfish, it is thoughtful and necessary.
Throughout elementary school, I was surrounded by a very large friend group, each of us with very diverse personalities. This broad range of identities and beliefs did not flow smoothly. There were constant visits with the guidance counselor following arguments that ranged from someone being left out, to someone going down the slide first at recess. This experience morphed me into being a ‘people pleaser’, struggling to distinguish the difference between what I wanted and what they wanted.
As we moved throughout the years, the group began to become narrower as some moved away and ideals shifted within us. Eventually, I was left with a much smaller, closely knit group of friends who I could trust. Some of them were from the original group while others I had newly acquired.
I spent most of my childhood worrying about how others felt or how much they liked me. After becoming distant from this once very large group of girls, I learned how to become more at peace with myself. Through this experience, and still today, I feel the stress easing away as I focus on filling my own cup first. At the end of the day, having fewer, closer friends is much more valuable than having many distant unreliable ones.
In order to reach this point of peace, it is important to learn more about yourself to understand what works best in your own life for your own wellbeing. Put yourself in situations that will not cause unreversible damage to your metal health in the long run. Always be mindful of who you choose to surround yourself with. Life is short, so choose peace.
I believe that open and honest communication would solve most social problems we have in our lives. My parents had an on and off relationship my whole life. When my mom found out she was pregnant my parents had been broken up for at least 2 months. They fought my whole life and I remember spending my childhood thinking why they would put each other through that and how I never wanted a relationship like theirs. They split up multiple times over the years and I realized that it was because they never had productive conversations with each other. All they did was scream and insult each other back and forth until someone gave in. Through the years I have developed a list of things I think are the key points to a productive and healthy communication style. The only rule to this is try your absolute best not to be offensive or rude. No name calling or berating people. The most important piece is 1. Be COMPLETELY honest. Lying to the people we care about gets us nowhere and they will never truly know your feelings.This also means openly communicating your feelings in the moment though, 2. Try not to have knee jerk reactions that can cause further conflict. If you feel a strong emotion that would derail the conversation, take a breath, fidget with something, and make note of it to bring up after the other person is done. 3. Be open minded. This process is difficult and people oftentimes have a hard time articulating complex feelings they have during this process. This goes directly to the next thing, 4. Ask questions and take notes if needed. This ensures that there are little to no miscommunications. Making a list of important topics beforehand is also helpful in case the conversation gets derailed. 5. Take breaks if needed. This is extremely mentally taxing and if you feel overwhelmed to a point where you need to stop, say it. Putting a temporary pin in the conversation is perfectly acceptable as long as it is not permanent
What we choose to hear matters. Maybe it could be a favorite song, or trying to listen to a lecture from a professor. It might even be the weather- Will it rain later today? Should I dress warmer? Or oftentimes, it’s hearing the news, which can be for better, or usually in my experience, for worse. We choose to listen to all of these things because they matter to us. They matter because they inform our thoughts in one way or another. I believe that listening is learning, and that it applies with people too.
This world, I like to think, is a library full of stories; of people, places, and experiences that are waiting to be shared. But often, I am so caught up and focused with writing my own story, that I fail to look beyond. I forget that others have a story too. Growing up, it wasn’t far from exaggeration to say that my grandfather was my entire world. He wasn’t the type of grandfather to read you a story, instead, he would often take on the role as a listner. After school, I would get off the bus, and he would start, as always, by asking the question “how was your day?”, and I was more than happy to tell him. But now, I see that a straighforward question, like that, really has more to it. Talking, in many ways, is used as an expression of feelings. But I think that listening communicates more deeply. In a single moment, it takes the focus off a single page, and gives way to a whole new story. My grandfather was diagnosed with dementia when I was 12 years old, and with it, he lost most of his ability to talk. He had the words, but was unable to share his story. That’s when everything changed. I took on the role of listener.
I remember being 12, and feeling like the world wasn’t meant for me. I felt like living wasn’t meant for me. It was hard to muster up even an ounce of feeling when everything exhausted me. I slept so much and not enough, and wanted to simply bury myself in the cold earth and never wake up. When I was 12, I was extremely depressed and passively suicidal. To me, there was no point in anything because I wanted to die and probably would soon. This led to an interesting mentality. If nothing mattered, why not do what I wanted? If I was going to die soon anyways, why not live how I wanted first? It was almost like seeing Death near you, scythe and all, and saying five more minutes.
So, I started doing whatever I wanted. I was always a goody two shoes, and probably always will be, so I didn’t start committing crimes, but I did start to hang out with friends more. I went to parties, and social events, and even hung out with my family more. I did some stupid stuff, like poking at my little brother more because I could, but for the most part, I started to live how I wanted.
As I got older, and I relied more on the people around me, I realized that I didn’t want to die anymore. I wanted to keep living, and keep experiencing all that I could. Life was so precious now; I had so many more good memories of living that the need for death felt further and further away. This revitalized will to live has brought with it new challenges. I now have a fear of death. What was once my companion and close friend is now my greatest fear. I have seen and felt what life can offer, and I do not want to lose it. How strange it is, to go from Death hanging near, to wanting to outrun the natural balance to life. I feel perhaps like a vampire, or an ancient emperor of old. I have come close to dying, felt my body and soul prepare for it, and was brought back. Now I feel desperate to keep this cherished life I lead. I almost want to start searching for some immortality gimmick, and see if I can live forever.
This I Believe Essay: I Am on The Right Track in Life
I have always been someone who overthinks a lot, it can get to a point where I feel like I am not on the right track with everything that I do. Or that something bad is going to happen to me, because things have been going so good in life. The thought process of “I have been doing so good, something bad has to occur”. As this first semester of college is ending, I realize how much I have grown as someone that believes in themselves. I realize that things are going well because I am on the right track, I am where I want to be. I don’t have to keep thinking that something bad will happen, and if it does that is life.
I have always been someone who would consider themselves to be a perfectionist. Everything has to go a certain way, or else it will not work out. I believe I have grown out of the phase and I am accepting things as they will come in my life.
This first semester I took classes that I was really interested in,
Deviance and Crime and Forensic Eyewitness Interviews. Both of these classes have made me realize that I am learning things that I will take with me when I eventually become a police officer. I am learning how to properly interview someone, which will be very beneficial for me in a few years. I know that I am learning the tools needed for my future career. This is making me excited and a little nervous, but everything will work out.
I have to also realize the amount of work I put in to get where I am right now. I took 10 college classes in high school to get ahead, and I have to always be proud of myself for doing that. I was the one that put in all of that extra work, nobody else completed those classes for me, it was just me. I have to always be proud of myself for completing those courses, I need to be proud of myself for working hard for my future career while I was still in high school. No one can take that education that I gained away from me.
To conclude, I can finally say that I believe that I am where I should be in life. I should stop thinking that I need to be in a father state of life, or should be doing more. Being in college is a big success, and I have to stop thinking that I need to be in a different stage of life. I can confidently say that I am where I should be. I am on the right path to where I want to go in life, and I need to enjoy this stage of my life while I can.
My chalked-up fingers held onto the plastic rock as I tried to find footing while not looking down at the 50ft drop beyond my feet. My arms were already tired even though this was my first assent this high up the gray face of the wall. I knew the height would get to me if I saw the floor drifting far beneath me. There was one thing that would get me to the top, and that was self-discipline.
I ended up finishing that climb, and many other endeavors due to self-discipline.
If you practice self-discipline on a day-to-day basis with the activities you do, you will be able to do more and have more free time. This would mean you have more time to rest, relax, or more time to do more things in general, which will lead to more accomplishments. It can range from focusing on work to eating heather, and in the end, it makes anyone a well-rounded person.
When you push yourself to greater heights, that is self-discipline. Getting yourself out of your comfort zone by doing something scary takes self-discipline to accomplish, and that lets you grow as a person.
A person who is organized, productive, healthy, and happy has the ability to help others who need it. Helping others is an important part of what I value, so practicing self-discipline, which helps me, is part of how I can then help those who need it.
The belief of self-discipline can be applied to any aspect of your life; you can then be a better person in every aspect of your life because of it. From waking up to starting your day in the morning, to going to bed at a time that is right, you can practice self-discipline to make yourself, and others, better people.
16 thoughts on “JOURNAL # 28 (TIB)”
For a while now I’ve bounced the idea around in my head that the future is as fixed as the past. When I say I think the future is fixed and unchangeable, I’m not referring to fateism, which is the theological belief that god is the arbiter of the future. My beliefs align more with the deterministic school of thought, the idea that the future is determined by preceding events in a never-ending butterfly effect. Following this school of thought, every decision we make is already determined by preceding events, which does make sense to me as the human brain at its core functions as a computer. The brain consciously and unconsciously computes information that it’s given and makes a decision. There is no randomness in how we process information, therefore all of our decisions are based purely on preceding events. These preceding events can vary from someone punching you in the gut to the tiniest movements of chemicals in the brain, and these events themselves are dictated by preceding events.
One of the reasons why this idea weighs so heavily on my mind is because it can’t be proven or disproven. The theory states that there’s only one decision you’ll take in any given circumstance due to cause and effect, but that’s impossible to prove or disprove, because in the end you will take a single decision, which could be the only possible decision you could’ve made, or it could’ve been one of millions. This theory also goes against chaos theory, which states that all natural systems are inherently unpredictable due to the amount of variables present in natural systems, but then again fractals, a commonly used example of chaos theory, are famous for following patterns. The main reason this theory weighs heavily on my mind is the idea that it invalidates the idea of self-determinism. After stewing over this for a long time, I came to the conclusion that determinism doesn’t invalidate self-determinism because we still make decisions ourselves, these decisions are just the only decisions we would ever have made due to cause and effect. By determinism, I was always destined to forget my keys in my dorm room when I went to tennis practice that one day, but it was also my fault for forgetting them like a dope as well.
The theory of determinism no longer brings me a feeling of dread, as I’ve reconciled my beliefs in regard to the theory. Determinism says that there’s only one outcome based on all preceding events, but it doesn’t mean free will doesn’t exist. Determinism doesn’t mean you have no control over your actions because they’re predetermined, it means that the action you take in a situation is the only action you would’ve taken. After reconciling my beliefs, I’ve come to believe that the future is dictated by determinism, and it’s just as unchangeable as the past.
For a while now I’ve bounced the idea around in my head that the future is as fixed as the past. When I say I think the future is fixed and unchangeable, I’m not referring to fateism, which is the theological belief that god is the arbiter of the future. My beliefs align more with the deterministic school of thought, the idea that the future is determined by preceding events in a never-ending butterfly effect. Following this school of thought, every decision we make is already determined by preceding events, which does make sense to me as the human brain at its core functions as a computer. The brain consciously and unconsciously computes information that it’s given and makes a decision. There is no randomness in how we process information, therefore all of our decisions are based purely on preceding events. These preceding events can vary from someone punching you in the gut to the tiniest movements of chemicals in the brain, and these events themselves are dictated by preceding events.
One of the reasons why this idea weighs so heavily on my mind is because it can’t be proven or disproven. The theory states that there’s only one decision you’ll take in any given circumstance due to cause and effect, but that’s impossible to prove or disprove, because in the end you will take a single decision, which could be the only possible decision you could’ve made, or it could’ve been one of millions. This theory also goes against chaos theory, which states that all natural systems are inherently unpredictable due to the amount of variables present in natural systems, but then again fractals, a commonly used example of chaos theory, are famous for following patterns. The main reason this theory weighs heavily on my mind is the idea that it invalidates the idea of self-determinism. After stewing over this for a long time, I came to the conclusion that determinism doesn’t invalidate self-determinism because we still make decisions ourselves, these decisions are just the only decisions we would ever have made due to cause and effect. By determinism, I was always destined to forget my keys in my dorm room when I went to tennis practice that one day, but it was also my fault for forgetting them like a dope as well.
The theory of determinism no longer brings me a feeling of dread, as I’ve reconciled my beliefs in regard to the theory. Determinism says that there’s only one outcome based on all preceding events, but it doesn’t mean free will doesn’t exist. Determinism doesn’t mean you have no control over your actions because they’re predetermined, it means that the action you take in a situation is the only action you would’ve taken. After reconciling my beliefs, I’ve come to believe that the future is dictated by determinism, and it’s just as unchangeable as the past.
The thought of what I might do after college with my degree or even in college never crossed my mind until after a few weeks I arrived at college. I knew I wanted to study Exercise Science, but I never set myself any goals with this. While we can all hope and dream, not everyone can attain those hopes and dreams. And I’m not talking about hoping for good grades, I mean the success and opportunities that will come from those grades. I want to put myself out there and meet new people and build strong connections with people that can help me find my success.
Here at UNE, we have access to all of these great resources and opportunities that can lead us to success not only academically but also personally. I need to start taking advantage of these opportunities, especially now that I have more time to myself. I’ve started to explore different internship opportunities that the AES program could help set up with me. This is very important to me because this is how I could get a job in my degree of work. Building connections with not only my current AES professor, but also the professors I will have over the next 3-4 years. They are the ones that have those connections and if I continue to make a good impression upon myself they will have great things to say during my internship application process.
Overall, I have realized a lot about my own wants and desires as a college student over this past semester. Talking to professors, friends, and even my parents opened my eyes to a lot of different paths I could take to reach my goals and the “success” that I want to achieve. However, talking to upperclassmen in the AES program left a significant impact on me and what I want to gain from the experiences this university offers. Looking forward, I will continue to make great use of my resources surrounding me because this will only help my path of attaining both my degree and a job in the near future.
I believe that being kind is punk rock, and I think of Superman as the best possible example, not as a symbol of hope, but as a lonely figure hovering above a world he cannot fix. Beneath the suit and emblem is someone who trusts everyone and thinks everyone is beautiful. We will never fully know what others are carrying, the exhaustion or stress weighing on them. But we can choose to pause and to show up even when it is hard or inconvenient. These acts do not erase the world’s burdens, yet they are quiet rebellions, fragile, fleeting, and full of meaning. They remind us, and those we reach toward, that even in the midst of chaos, human connection still exists.
I am incredibly lucky to have my very own Superman to look up to: my dad. He is the walking definition of kindness, strong in a way that isn’t loud or flashy. His strength is quiet, patient, and unyielding. He shows me every day that courage is not about invincibility or grand gestures, it is about staying soft-handed in a world that would rather you harden, choosing to give when it costs you the most, and refusing to turn away from the suffering of others.
This year, my dad was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis, a chronic autoimmune disease that attacks the protective layer around the nerves in the brain and spinal cord. Thinking back on all our years in church, he was always the first to hold the door and greet new members, offer help in Sunday school, or step in when someone needed support. He has always been the model of who I hope to be, someone who gives without expectation and leads with quiet kindness. Even now, as he faces this diagnosis, he remains just as open and generous as before. When the world gives him every reason to turn hard, he chooses compassion. He still welcomes anyone in need, offering what he can, even on days when he has so little left for himself.
I believe in spending quality time with the people you love. One of my love languages is quality time, and I believe that going out of your way to spend quality time with loved ones creates deep, meaningful connections that will last a lifetime.
My grandfather, Poppop, owns a 1968 Chevrolet Camero. A beautifully shiny, black classic car with two thick white strips down the middle. A car that not only sparked my grandfather’s interest but also sparked my father’s interest and my own. When my grandfather was working, he would come home every day and spend time perfecting his already perfect Camero. When my dad was young, he spent every second he could out in the garage helping my grandfather get the car ready for the next big car show. With the Camero being the winner of almost every car show, it became a passion of both my dad and Poppop to attend as many car shows together as possible.
When my dad graduated high school, he went right into trade and started working as an auto technician. Poppop was the reason my dad loved cars, so he decided to spend the next 37 years (as of 2025) underneath and in the hoods of cars trying to fix them.
On take your child to work day I would always beg to go with my dad. I thought that tearing things apart just to put them back together was fascinating. I would sit on my dad’s work bench handing him tools and writing everything he said down in my blue sparkly notebook. He sparked my passion in cars, and now the three of us bond over that same 1968 Chevrolet Camero that my grandfather still takes to every car show. That car has been the talk of my town for almost 50 years, and it will continue to see the street instead of sitting in a garage thanks to the quality time that my grandfather, my dad, and I all spend together. Seeing the physical trophies on the shelf in Poppop’s garage reminds me of the hours that we spend together talking about the same car. Some things never get old.
Truly getting to know someone comes with spending quality time with them. Not only do you get to know your loved ones better, but you create common interests and similarities. Building deep connections builds your character, which is why part of my character shares a common interest with the characters of my dad and my grandfather. Take the time out of your day to do something you love with the people you love, it will change your life forever.
Most people go through life waiting for the next thing to happen and always looking ahead to the future. I get to go home this weekend, I have these plans for this day, and the list goes on. I am just as guilty of this as anyone else, I look ahead, wait for the next thing, ect. While this is not always a bad thing we don’t always realize that while we are looking ahead we are missing things in the moment and then we look back and think how crazy time flies or how we wish we would have enjoyed this moment more when we were in them. I have always thought like this and yet I still continue not to think too much at the moment. I started working as a cna when I was 17 at an assisted living and I believe that since working there I have gotten an overall new perspective on life and just how fast time goes.
Working at assisted living and helping others while also hearing so many different stories from my residents has changed my overall perspective on life. It was very humbling starting to work here at a younger age and just seeing the different perspectives people have on aging. I will go into residents’ rooms and help them with things that at this point in my life I just could not imagine not being able to do myself and realizing that one day I will probably be there too. Residents just love talking and sharing stories from their lives and I always love when they show me pictures from when they were younger as well and it really puts into perspective how fast time really does go by.
I think the main takeaway from this is just to try to live life more in the moment and try to not live life mainly looking to the future.
Before coming to UNE I had few solid friends and didn’t really fit into a group. High school felt like a secluding place and that only certain people deserve to have large groups of friends. When coming to UNE I discovered that this was a fresh slate and everyone was starting over. Having the comfort of knowing this allowed me to be myself and not try to fit into a mold or expectation. A motto I live my life by is everything happens for a reason and things will always work out eventually and I think coming to UNE and finding my friends and settling into a place where I feel comfortable was the biggest proof of this motto for me. Throughout my entire life I have always felt like I didn’t know where I belonged or who I belonged with. Coming into college I knew I wanted to try to find myself and people who aligned with my values and supported them.
Something I knew was important to me when attending college was surrounding myself with people who I felt comfortable with and could feel the same with me. Thankfully that happened within my first days here and I built a strong community of people who I trusted and could be myself around. I began to get closer with my group and individuals which led me to some of my best friends. After things wouldn’t go our way, we would remind ourselves that everything happens for a reason and we need to accept the fact that not everything can go as planned all the time. Being able to share my belief of that helped strengthen our friendship knowing she shared the same one and reminding each other of it. When others ask why we believe this or what it is we explain it as accepting what we are giving and making the best of it because if you can’t make the best of what your given life will be miserable and unenjoyable so if you roll with the punches and find the joy in the little things life can be so fun.
When I think about the happiest times in my life, I think about what it took for me to get there. I ponder the choices I made, the people I met, and the risks I took. I’ve noticed a pattern within this: I’ve found that I experience my best moments when I’m outside of my comfort zone. When I step outside of that box of comfortability, I find new friends, experiences, confidence, and I make my most joyous memories.
Growing up, I was told by my mother, “Good thing you’re so tough.” She would use this to empower me during hard moments. I found it invalidating at the time, but as I matured, I found a sense of strength in it. I realized what she meant by it, the depth she was conveying in her words. When I encountered difficult times, I thought of this saying, and I persevered. With this new found strength, I felt comfortable stepping outside of my comfort zone. I felt safe within the unknown of life, fearless of the inevitable ebb and flow. I pursued opportunities, even if I had to work hard to get them. I found a sense of reward and fulfillment once I tackled difficult experiences. And best of all, I felt confident in myself even in the most unstable times.
The beauty of life is found outside of your comfort zone. It might sound daunting to climb a mountain, but if you find joy in the climb, if you let go of your fear and negativity, you will be free of the confines of your comfort zone. And, when you reach the summit, the sense of satisfaction you feel within yourself will be paramount to any other feeling. There’s a lot to learn from pushing your boundaries. You will find your happiest, most confident self. You will make many memories to look back on, and smile.
This piece is going to be about personal growth and how at the right time and with the right people personal growth can be a huge magical thing for someone. This can be something that is very important to one person and not as much to another. You know in high school, that time when a teacher makes everyone write something down that they want to improve on or work on. There is always that one person who says they want to grow as a person and try to improve themselves. A lot of times there isn’t just that one person that wants that. More often than not there is at least one other person that wants to say that but they think that it is not a good enough reason. Personal growth or growing in general is a good thing that happens. The current adults in the world had to have gone through personal growth at some point, maybe they are still going through it or just starting to go through it. When I was in middle school my best friend decided that we weren’t friends anymore. That moment made me think back and look at everything and for me that is when some of my personal growth started. I realized that not everyone I was friends with actually liked me and it was bringing me down. I dropped those people and it was like some sort of weight was lifted, I found people that liked me for me. They understood my humor and we shared jokes and memories and created new ones. I found these people freshman year of high school and we have been friends ever since. They make me feel like me and see. They helped me figure out who I am in a way and feel good about who I am. Finding these people can be like a light at the end of a tunnel. If you don’t surround yourself with people who will help you grow and become who you want to be, they shouldn’t be worth your time. You will know at the time when you find the people that will help you become you. Sometimes to get personal growth you might need to step out of your comfort zone and try some new things and meet new people, have a change of scenery. Trying to find things to unlock your new personal growth. No one ever stops growing they just might not know that it is happening, which is ok because that means that they are comfortable with personal growth and things changing.
Coming to college has made me realize that you will find your people. Back at home, I live in a very small town where everyone knows everyone. This makes it very hard to choose who your friends are. Oftentimes, I found myself stuck with the same group of people. Throughout my entire childhood, during elementary, middle and some of highschool, I would have friends but they were never very meaningful and most of them ended with an argument. I didn’t feel like I was being treated like I should be so I dropped those people. After years of doing this I began to think that this is how friendships are. That was until I met my best friend. Meeting her and becoming so close opened my eyes to what true friendships are. I felt so lucky to have her. Then I moved away to college and met 7 more friends just like her. This is why I believe that true friendship is one of the best things you can have in life.
I fully believe that I am nothing without my friends. I have a lot of trouble putting how I feel into words. Throughout my life, I have not had the best luck with friendship. I may have always had friends but they never lasted because I felt like I cared way more than they ever did. When I care about someone, I put a lot of effort into my relationship with that person, and when I didn’t receive that back I was often hurt. When I finally found friends that returned the same amount of effort that I put in, I was so happy. This is why I believe that true friendships are one of the best things you can have in life. I am so close with my friends that they feel like a second family. Since having friends like these, I have never been happier. I value these people as much as I value myself and I know that they feel the same way.
This I Believe Essay Outline
I believe in protecting your own peace and wellbeing above everyone else. There is only one way to ensure your peace; do what makes you happy, not what makes others happy. Setting boundaries and making your intentions clear is not selfish, it is thoughtful and necessary.
Throughout elementary school, I was surrounded by a very large friend group, each of us with very diverse personalities. This broad range of identities and beliefs did not flow smoothly. There were constant visits with the guidance counselor following arguments that ranged from someone being left out, to someone going down the slide first at recess. This experience morphed me into being a ‘people pleaser’, struggling to distinguish the difference between what I wanted and what they wanted.
As we moved throughout the years, the group began to become narrower as some moved away and ideals shifted within us. Eventually, I was left with a much smaller, closely knit group of friends who I could trust. Some of them were from the original group while others I had newly acquired.
I spent most of my childhood worrying about how others felt or how much they liked me. After becoming distant from this once very large group of girls, I learned how to become more at peace with myself. Through this experience, and still today, I feel the stress easing away as I focus on filling my own cup first. At the end of the day, having fewer, closer friends is much more valuable than having many distant unreliable ones.
In order to reach this point of peace, it is important to learn more about yourself to understand what works best in your own life for your own wellbeing. Put yourself in situations that will not cause unreversible damage to your metal health in the long run. Always be mindful of who you choose to surround yourself with. Life is short, so choose peace.
I believe that open and honest communication would solve most social problems we have in our lives. My parents had an on and off relationship my whole life. When my mom found out she was pregnant my parents had been broken up for at least 2 months. They fought my whole life and I remember spending my childhood thinking why they would put each other through that and how I never wanted a relationship like theirs. They split up multiple times over the years and I realized that it was because they never had productive conversations with each other. All they did was scream and insult each other back and forth until someone gave in. Through the years I have developed a list of things I think are the key points to a productive and healthy communication style. The only rule to this is try your absolute best not to be offensive or rude. No name calling or berating people. The most important piece is 1. Be COMPLETELY honest. Lying to the people we care about gets us nowhere and they will never truly know your feelings.This also means openly communicating your feelings in the moment though, 2. Try not to have knee jerk reactions that can cause further conflict. If you feel a strong emotion that would derail the conversation, take a breath, fidget with something, and make note of it to bring up after the other person is done. 3. Be open minded. This process is difficult and people oftentimes have a hard time articulating complex feelings they have during this process. This goes directly to the next thing, 4. Ask questions and take notes if needed. This ensures that there are little to no miscommunications. Making a list of important topics beforehand is also helpful in case the conversation gets derailed. 5. Take breaks if needed. This is extremely mentally taxing and if you feel overwhelmed to a point where you need to stop, say it. Putting a temporary pin in the conversation is perfectly acceptable as long as it is not permanent
What we choose to hear matters. Maybe it could be a favorite song, or trying to listen to a lecture from a professor. It might even be the weather- Will it rain later today? Should I dress warmer? Or oftentimes, it’s hearing the news, which can be for better, or usually in my experience, for worse. We choose to listen to all of these things because they matter to us. They matter because they inform our thoughts in one way or another. I believe that listening is learning, and that it applies with people too.
This world, I like to think, is a library full of stories; of people, places, and experiences that are waiting to be shared. But often, I am so caught up and focused with writing my own story, that I fail to look beyond. I forget that others have a story too. Growing up, it wasn’t far from exaggeration to say that my grandfather was my entire world. He wasn’t the type of grandfather to read you a story, instead, he would often take on the role as a listner. After school, I would get off the bus, and he would start, as always, by asking the question “how was your day?”, and I was more than happy to tell him. But now, I see that a straighforward question, like that, really has more to it. Talking, in many ways, is used as an expression of feelings. But I think that listening communicates more deeply. In a single moment, it takes the focus off a single page, and gives way to a whole new story. My grandfather was diagnosed with dementia when I was 12 years old, and with it, he lost most of his ability to talk. He had the words, but was unable to share his story. That’s when everything changed. I took on the role of listener.
I remember being 12, and feeling like the world wasn’t meant for me. I felt like living wasn’t meant for me. It was hard to muster up even an ounce of feeling when everything exhausted me. I slept so much and not enough, and wanted to simply bury myself in the cold earth and never wake up. When I was 12, I was extremely depressed and passively suicidal. To me, there was no point in anything because I wanted to die and probably would soon. This led to an interesting mentality. If nothing mattered, why not do what I wanted? If I was going to die soon anyways, why not live how I wanted first? It was almost like seeing Death near you, scythe and all, and saying five more minutes.
So, I started doing whatever I wanted. I was always a goody two shoes, and probably always will be, so I didn’t start committing crimes, but I did start to hang out with friends more. I went to parties, and social events, and even hung out with my family more. I did some stupid stuff, like poking at my little brother more because I could, but for the most part, I started to live how I wanted.
As I got older, and I relied more on the people around me, I realized that I didn’t want to die anymore. I wanted to keep living, and keep experiencing all that I could. Life was so precious now; I had so many more good memories of living that the need for death felt further and further away. This revitalized will to live has brought with it new challenges. I now have a fear of death. What was once my companion and close friend is now my greatest fear. I have seen and felt what life can offer, and I do not want to lose it. How strange it is, to go from Death hanging near, to wanting to outrun the natural balance to life. I feel perhaps like a vampire, or an ancient emperor of old. I have come close to dying, felt my body and soul prepare for it, and was brought back. Now I feel desperate to keep this cherished life I lead. I almost want to start searching for some immortality gimmick, and see if I can live forever.
This I Believe Essay: I Am on The Right Track in Life
I have always been someone who overthinks a lot, it can get to a point where I feel like I am not on the right track with everything that I do. Or that something bad is going to happen to me, because things have been going so good in life. The thought process of “I have been doing so good, something bad has to occur”. As this first semester of college is ending, I realize how much I have grown as someone that believes in themselves. I realize that things are going well because I am on the right track, I am where I want to be. I don’t have to keep thinking that something bad will happen, and if it does that is life.
I have always been someone who would consider themselves to be a perfectionist. Everything has to go a certain way, or else it will not work out. I believe I have grown out of the phase and I am accepting things as they will come in my life.
This first semester I took classes that I was really interested in,
Deviance and Crime and Forensic Eyewitness Interviews. Both of these classes have made me realize that I am learning things that I will take with me when I eventually become a police officer. I am learning how to properly interview someone, which will be very beneficial for me in a few years. I know that I am learning the tools needed for my future career. This is making me excited and a little nervous, but everything will work out.
I have to also realize the amount of work I put in to get where I am right now. I took 10 college classes in high school to get ahead, and I have to always be proud of myself for doing that. I was the one that put in all of that extra work, nobody else completed those classes for me, it was just me. I have to always be proud of myself for completing those courses, I need to be proud of myself for working hard for my future career while I was still in high school. No one can take that education that I gained away from me.
To conclude, I can finally say that I believe that I am where I should be in life. I should stop thinking that I need to be in a father state of life, or should be doing more. Being in college is a big success, and I have to stop thinking that I need to be in a different stage of life. I can confidently say that I am where I should be. I am on the right path to where I want to go in life, and I need to enjoy this stage of my life while I can.
My chalked-up fingers held onto the plastic rock as I tried to find footing while not looking down at the 50ft drop beyond my feet. My arms were already tired even though this was my first assent this high up the gray face of the wall. I knew the height would get to me if I saw the floor drifting far beneath me. There was one thing that would get me to the top, and that was self-discipline.
I ended up finishing that climb, and many other endeavors due to self-discipline.
If you practice self-discipline on a day-to-day basis with the activities you do, you will be able to do more and have more free time. This would mean you have more time to rest, relax, or more time to do more things in general, which will lead to more accomplishments. It can range from focusing on work to eating heather, and in the end, it makes anyone a well-rounded person.
When you push yourself to greater heights, that is self-discipline. Getting yourself out of your comfort zone by doing something scary takes self-discipline to accomplish, and that lets you grow as a person.
A person who is organized, productive, healthy, and happy has the ability to help others who need it. Helping others is an important part of what I value, so practicing self-discipline, which helps me, is part of how I can then help those who need it.
The belief of self-discipline can be applied to any aspect of your life; you can then be a better person in every aspect of your life because of it. From waking up to starting your day in the morning, to going to bed at a time that is right, you can practice self-discipline to make yourself, and others, better people.